It’s Healthy To Hate Ferrets!

Are you a ferret lover?  Well, if you are then you aren’t  going to be thrilled with this next story.  Luckily, I hate ferrets, so this story doesn’t bother me, well, not as much as it would have if I liked ferrets.

Maybe I should launch the story, eh?

Scientists have bred ferrets who can spread the bird  flu or Avian virus H5n1.  That means that they can catch it from each other simply by being in the same space.  In otherwords it’s “airborne”.  While it might be a little darkly  amusing to think about  national defense scientists worrying about bird flu being airborne…the fact is it’s a really scary proposition since humans are not immune to it.  In otherwords, if it spreads from human to human like it is spreading among the ferrets at Erasmus University then we are all up the proverbial creek without a paddle.

It is a pandemic’s dream flu.  It will tear through societies wiping out a third if not more of us.  We will become infected and we’ll spread it by breathing or by touching things and like just like in the horrifying movie “Contagion” it will murderize us, just like it’s killing the ferrets.

Okay, to sum up,watch out for infected birds.  But seriously, you must avoid infected ferrets  at all costs!  I don’t know why scientists chose poor defenseless ferrets, but with this virus everyone is defenseless. ( Even a ferret hater like me can feel bad for snuffly sneezing, ferrets that succumb to  massive organ failure.)

Let’s not worry about the scarier scenario about  scientists who are being paid by Governments to find viruses that will kill any life forms it contacts.  That is something we should have expected in this brave new world. If you didn’t expect it you are an idiot.

No, what we really should be worrying about is  some crazed  terrorist group that gets it’s hands on the virus because they could   infect some species like…um… tea cup pomeranians!  Zoiks!   If they set them loose on city  streets  then all the little girls in America as well as  some of their relatives could be infected within hours.

Tips for the day:

Don’t go near birds.

Don’t go to foreign countries that are having  outbreaks of bird flu.

Don’t worry about Government paid evil scientists.

Stay away from sneezing ferrets!

And last  but not  least,  if you see dozens of cute tiny little puppies running around loose then really,  back away slowly and call the authorities!







1 thought on “It’s Healthy To Hate Ferrets!”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s