Ms. Paul over at the Huff Post had a list of things that she thought young married people should see, I think she was addressing herself particularly to the women in the equation,but trust me, both parties should take a look at this list and hopefully that will help them understand that long term relationships aren’t about 24/7 romance…sometimes they are about doing your own thing while being aware you are in a committed relationship.
Check out the ideas that some members of her blog came up with:
It’s OK not to like your husband.
It’s OK, and even healthy, to want to be alone for a day or two.
It’s OK not to want to do every activity with your husband.
It’s OK to find other men attractive (just don’t act on it).
It’s OK to feel nothing but love one minute, hatred the next, annoyance the next, ambivalence the next, back to love toward your husband all in one hour.
It’s OK to want to be selfish sometimes.
It’s OK to do things and think about things in different ways. It doesn’t mean one of you is right and one of you is wrong.
IT’S OK TO GO TO BED ANGRY!
It’s OK not to want sex all the time (but giving in even when it’s the last thing you want to do is OK, too).
Those are just some that I thought of. Anyone find anything else that caught them off guard but is really OK in the realm of marriage?
And women did. Here are some other responses:
- It’s okay to feel bored.
- It’s okay to sit on the couch and have nothing to talk about.
- It’s okay to want time alone.
- It’s okay not to miss your partner every time you’re away from each other.
- It’s okay not to want to rip his/her clothes off every time he/she walks through the door.
- It’s okay to feel annoyed.
- It’s okay to wonder about other people.
- It’s okay to have doubt.
- It’s okay to have uncertainty.
- It’s okay not to think all of your partner’s jokes are funny.
- It’s okay to feel awkward around each other, even after being together for many years.