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Everything Is Great, Why Am I Sad?

I  woke up sad.  I closed my eyes hoping to go back to sleep, but the damage was done, I was awake and the sadness was going to have to accompany me while I picked out my clothes for the day.  By the way, I chose to put on clothes I’ve already worn this week which is generally a “no no” in my book, but I didn’t care that much about what I was wearing.

As I stepped  into the shower I wondered what about my dream, or my day was making me feel so down?  Nothing came to me but snippets of experiences I’ve recently had with people who had experienced  loss in their lives.

I spoke to a friend who recently lost her folks and it was her job to go clean out a lifetime of memories.

I spoke to someone who made a lovely skirt out of t-shirts.  I  commented on it telling her I loved it, and when she said she made it I was naturally impressed and then she  explained why she made it….she lost her brother a year ago.

I spoke to a woman who wanted something to donate and I told her that I admired people who donated annually to special causes…and she told me it was in honor of her daughter who died a year ago.

Wow.  Loss hurts and there isn’t any practical way to deal with it is there?  We all have to pretty much figure it out on our own, and maybe that is what is making me sad today.

I’ve lost people, sometimes through death, sometimes through people just moving, or moving on.  I’ve lost people I’ve cared about because  I was stupid, or maybe it’s okay to admit that maybe they were stupid too.  But I understand loss and I care about folks who have the feeling that they are walking a little more slowly, with a little more care than they’d like.

I just want to let you know that there are people who want to let you talk, not for any sort of compensatory gain, or for their own purposes.  I want you to know that there are people who get what you are dealing with.  There are people like me, who wake up on a bright sunny day, one of the first days of a fresh bright autumn…who feel sadness.

Just think about it…and try to accept that there isn’t anything at all wrong with you, and what you are feeling.  Feelings are deep rooted.  Just let them happen, and if there is something you think you might be able to do to relieve them even a tiny bit then take courage and try.  For me, I thought that maybe typing a little about this might help.

What will help you?

love,

mo

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