Over at Huffpost I read about a Barna survey http://www.barna.org/faith-spirituality/508-20-years-of-surveys-show-key-differences-in-the-faith-of-americas-men-and-women
which looked at Christian Churches over the last 20 years to see if there were any changes either positive changes, or negative ones. And it turns out that there is a slight concern with a negative change in the participation of women in churches.
I remember a few years back I was an active member at my local church. I taught Sunday School, and I read during Worship and I even delivered a few sermons believe it or not. I was lucky enough to be allowed to preside over a group of women from churches all around the Pottstown area. It was a really challenging and wonderful experience but I was a young mother at the time and I found myself torn several times because I was working and raising kids and helping them in school and with their activities. I felt absolutely worn out some days.
I remember attending a women’s conference. I was seated at lunch with a group of lovely ladies from all over the country and we were talking about the future of women in the church. I mentioned that I thought it was harder for women to be part of the life of the church because they were being asked to meet so many other committments. Shockingly, most of the women at the table disagreed with me. I was really surprised.
I remember looking at my parfait and thinking of my family at home. That luncheon stands out clearly as one of the times that I felt stressed.
Now perhaps I’m more easily stressed than some other women. Maybe I worry more about meeting other people’s expectations than I should. But I thought then and I still think now that Church is a place where we should be able to come with our concerns and our worries without being told we are wrong, or that our fears or concerns are unfounded.
Ultimately my experience with the Church didn’t make me feel as if I belonged. Of course that lunch wasn’t the final event that made me walk away…there were other worries, but I’m one of those people who could quote scripture, and I could talk about the early Church Fathers and I could discuss current events in relation to biblical principles- but nonetheless I walked away.
I think that I do that a lot. I don’t consider that behavior responsible. It isn’t something I’m very proud of. But it’s like I have to be ‘honest’. I have to be true to me. I got to a place where I didn’t have anyone around to answer my most pressing questions. It was the “dark night of my soul”. And rather than digging in deeper and wrestling with my dilemma. I put it aside. It wasn’t my best move, but I’m okay with it.
I admire folks who are active in their Churches. I think faith and religion are good things.
This Barna survey makes me a little sad. I’m not glad that there are more women walking away from Church. I’m afraid I understand what might be happening…but it makes me feel sad.
love,
mo
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